Although I no longer feel welcomed there, Dave and I drove to Jerome to visit his Family on Christmas Day. When we got there, nobody was home, so we spent a little time together enjoying each other's company and the smell of the Turkey cooking in the oven. Before long, the family came home, and I went out to the truck to charge my phone. Jacob got out of his vehicle, brought 2 gifts to my truck and said they were for Rj, the son he has with another woman. I let him put them in my truck, and then he told me he wanted to come with me to see him. I had to go there to pick a picture up and said that was fine, but he had to let everyone know where we were going. We had to wait an hour before we headed over there, and when the time came to go, as I was heading out the door, I heard " Where are you guys going?". I was too far away to hear what was answered, but Jacob's wife came to the truck and asked " Are you going to go see that B*&@$" and Jacob replied "No, I'm going to go see my son." and she slammed my door. After laying into her about slamming my door, we all got ready to pull out when Dave's dad came running out of the house, hollering for Jacob to come back and talk to him. He did, and as he got to his Dad, I sent Dave to make sure facts were set straight. Things began to get pretty ugly, and I was ready to gather our things, get Dave and head home. I heard Dave's dad say that Jacob was throwing away his family for a child nobody else can get to know, as that was said, Dave stepped in and started telling him that the child's mother WANTS him to know his dad's family. Before he could finish his sentence, his dad told him to butt out and that it was none of his business. One thing lead to another and the boys got in the truck and we left.
When we got back, Dave's mom was in her room, his dad took Jacob into another room and talked to Jacob, and Dave walked over to Dana, looked her in the eyes and had a lengthy lecture/talk to her. She tried to deny the extent of her involvement on the situation, said the kids weren't allowed near RJ because she wasn't and all other kinds of CHILDISH crap! Dave told her that he didn't care how or what happened, all that matters is the children at this point. He told her that it wasn't fair the kids got to know their "sister from another mister" but aren't allowed to know their "brother from another mother". He didn't care how either came to be, it was childish to punish the kids just because both mothers don't see eye to eye or like each other. He also reinstated what we've been saying all along, she and Jacob need to leave phones off or at home, drop the kids off with the grandparents and go somewhere and talk. From there, he went into his mom's room to talk to her.
I didn't hear much of that conversation, other than I went in and told her myself that Rj's mom wants him to get to know them and everyone else in the family, that I would make arrangements for them ALL to meet him. By this time, dinner was ready and we ate, and went about our Christmas business. When we left, we went by the Hospital to visit Dave's grandfather for a little bit. On our drive home, I found something out that just got me floored. While he was talking to her, Dave's mom told him something that I suspected for a while would happen. There's people in the family who firmly believe/think that the family is having problems because David decided to join the LDS church. Yes, I was quite mad at hearing this, seriously, do you have to be that ignorant? I just can't really understand how people can be so, ugh, I can't even find the words for it. Blaming family problems on a different religion as yours is like me saying I don't have kids because my sister has tattoos. Seriously folks, religion doesn't really cause problems, no matter what kind of religion it is. People cause problems, and if you're out accusing others and their beliefs for those problems, you're a big coward. What gets me even more is that Dave and I are really not included in the family. I have began to consider ourselves "Black Sheep" because nobody on that side ever talks to us with the exception of Jacob or Rachel, unless it's about a birthday, we're never kept in the loop on what's going on in the family, and when we try to make contact, well, honestly, I've had a better conversation out of a wall. Despite feeling this way, I'm working with Rj's mom to get them to meet with Dave's family. I'm focusing on my husband and myself, and at this point, like I've told Rachel and Jacob, I'm gonna be there for Jacob, Rachel and the kids. Everyone else doesn't want a thing to do with us, well, that's their problems. I'm sorry, but "I Love You" are just words if you don't act on them, I have learned that by experience. Family used to be so important to me, and now, I wonder. Really, what does it mean anymore. I was thinking about the old saying "Blood is thicker than water" well, I've added a twist to that, "Blood is thicker than water because of all the CRAP in that blood." I'm done ranting, so I hope you all enjoyed, I enjoyed quite a few aspects of my Christmas with the In-Laws, but am glad it's over. Happy Holidays.
